Anti-Feminism Feminism?

While I concede that I have not extensively explored the Ladies Against Feminism website, I approached it with the utmost prejudice. Let this be a life lesson: groups that one disagrees with on principle can sometimes be right. It was from their homepage that I got to this article. It made me think about what I believe are the real fights feminism should be fighting and how we should be fighting them.

Before I begin, I would like to point out that I do not agree 100% with what Albert Mohler has to say. I think he does not provide a solution to the problem Linda Hirshman raises when she says "an educated, competent adult's place is in the office," meaning women should be at work and not at home, beyond reinforcing traditional gender roles as they are played out in our society.

That motherhood would be a less worthy occupation for a woman with an MBA from Wharton's than a high paying executive job on Wall Street is the main problem with Hirshman's argument. Mohler quotes, "Housekeeping and child-rearing in the nuclear family is not interesting and socially validated." He writes further, "[Hirshman] doesn't buy into the arguments of many homemakers who say taking care of the family is the most fulfilling thing they can imagine." I agree with him on this count. She is not focusing on the right side of the argument. The problem is not about where women are the most fulfilled, if at work or at home, but why men cannot find that same fulfillment in either sphere. The viewpoint that housework and child-rearing are not socially valitdated is not constructive to her argument.

Mohler quotes, "while the public world has changed, albeit imperfectly, to accomodate women among the elite, private lives have hardly budged. The real glass ceiling is at home." This appears to be true, and it has to do with preconceived notions of gender roles. The problem is not women choosing to be stay-at-home mothers. The real problem is men not considering that same option. The idea that either mom stays home or no one does is really the core of this whole debate. Theoretically, housekeeping and child-rearing are validated, but only if those same things are done by a woman. Again, the issue is not how women relate to the problem of stay-at-home parent, but how men do. A man in a domestic, child-rearing environment does not fit in with our society's male stereotype.

I think Hirshman really hits the nail on the head when she says, "prying women out of their traditional roles is not going to be easy." This is really what's at stake; however, it should not exclude women from choosing motherhood. There is nothing inherently wrong with choosing motherhood, and this is where I agree with Mohler. He writes, "the thought that motherhood could be a higher calling than law, medicine, finance, or any number of other professions is completely beyond [Hershman's] comprehension." I also think this point is precisely what is at fault with Mohler's article. Feminism is not just about empowering women. It is about redefining gender roles where men and women are truly equal. That means sharing the responsibilities of parenthood, and breaking out of the notion that the only parent fit to stay at home is the mother.

Hirshman has a worthy fight, but she is not approaching it in the best way. By affirming that home life is unfulfilling and that motherhood sets back the feminist movement is precisely the wrong way to gather support from either men or women. Albert Mohler, although his defense of motherhood is necessary, does not go far enough in proposing a solution to the problem. He writes, "the Christian response to [Hirshman's] article must be a combination of refutation, amazement, and affirmation of motherhood." He should also point out that a child has two parents, and by definition, one parent is a mother and the other is a father. And if this truly is the Christian response, those two parents are married. Perhaps I am naïve to suppose that Mohler would go so far as to propose that perhaps the father should step up to the role of stay-at-home daddy.

Ultimately, the problem is not women in the workplace, and it is certainly not motherhood as an unworthy choice. The idea that fatherhood "could be a higher calling than law, medicine, finance, or any number of other professions is completely beyond" most men's comprehension. That is the real problem.